I Think I Love My Life

Many years of school have taught me how to be a scholar. If there is a book worth reading, I want it. So when it came time for me to relocate to New York, I did what I know to do best; I read a book entitled Relocating to New York City and Surrounding Areas. Unfortunately, there is no book or amount of advice - or weekend seminar for that matter - that could have prepared me for such a transition. Although the book was helpful, it lacked some very pertinent chapters. As a result, I feel it is more than necessary to provide you with some personal supplementary chapters.

Chapter One - "All Cried Out"

I'm not typically inclined to burst into to tears, - I'm still waiting for The Notebook to trigger a reaction - but for some reason I couldn't stop crying the day I moved. I was finishing the last of my packing when I had a brief moment in my room; I assumed that would be the end of it, but I was far from being done. When “Bond” (that unpredictable man who finds a way to do something sweet a moment before you consider deleting him from your contacts) came over to help me ship my boxes, I started to notice a pattern. Every time we transitioned from one phase to another, I would cry. I cried when he moved all of the boxes out of my room. Then I cried when he loaded all of the boxes onto the Uhaul. I cried when he unloaded the Uhual and put my boxes on pallets at the Amtrak station, and again when I gave the foreman the money for my shipment.

Afterwards, we returned the Uhaul and headed back to my house. I was confident the crying was under control because there was nothing left to do besides wait for my mother to take me to the airport. When we arrived at my place something strange occurred. It seemed as though my tear ducts became larger and I lost the ability to hold back the tears because I realized it was time for Bond and I to say goodbye. A few months prior I had told myself that this moment would not be like the end of Casablanca; it would be swift and easy. Our goodbye was nothing like Casablanca. It was better. It pretty much encompassed our entire relationship. Honest, funny, and deeply emotional. Somehow, it caught me by surprise. I knew I was going to miss him, but I didn’t know he was going to react to the emotions and the crying so perfectly. I think my love for him might have grown deeper in that instance. After an hour or so of multiple failed attempts to leave, he finally managed to walk out the door.

Ten minutes later, my mom came home to find me lying on the bed, eyes swollen, looking pitiful. She gently placed her hand on my back and asked, “Baby, are your cramps that bad.” I chuckled. Then I cried because it was time for me to say goodbye to the greatest person in my life. My mom means the world to me, and I think the world knew. Why? Because I cried all the way to the airport, through the baggage check-in line, during the security check, and in the diner where I had dinner. I basically cried until it was time for me to board the plane. I was so exhausted from crying I slept through my entire flight.

I woke up the next morning with a head ache and a new roommate. We were so excited to be official residents of New York City. We grabbed our bags, hopped on the Super Shuttle, and headed to Harlem. As we stood in front of the door of our new apartment I was hit with a number of feelings. I was excited and scared, but mostly anxious because I had never seen the place. Dez opened the door and this is what we saw…
Well, that’s just the bathroom. But the entire apartment was cluttered, dark, and filthy. And when we opened the door to my room we found living beings asleep in a fully assembled bed. I called my mom to let her know I had arrived safely. She knew something was wrong because I really didn’t have much to say. I immediately called Jas to ask if we could come over to take a shower and nap – there was no way I was doing ANYTHING in that apartment. I stood in the middle of the living room as my mind raced. I had to sit on the edge of the rancid futon just to keep from losing it. I finally broke. I put my face in my palms and let it rip. Dez followed with a barrage of tears.

Chapter 2 – “Little Child Runnin’ Wild”

There we were, two women, roaming the streets of New York looking like lost children. We were hungry, tired, and funky. I had a backpack, my money mug, and the same “Cali Girl” shirt I had worn while moving. Dez had her small rolling luggage and a dirty sun dress. The only thing appealing about our appearance was our new haircuts. We were the definition of high class homelessness.

We finally satisfied our hunger with chicken and waffles at Amy Ruth’s. Just as we were getting ready to leave, the men at the table next to ours struck up a conversation. Coincidentally, one was a general contractor and the other two were electricians. They offered to pay for our food, but we were hoping that they would offer to do an extreme make over on our apartment. We struck out. However, the general contractor did offer to take us to dinner when he saw us wandering the streets shortly after our initial conversation.

Chapter 3 – “We Live in Brooklyn Baby”

I love Brooklyn. The streets are lined with trees and there is a peace – West of Malcolm X Boulevard – that is a little harder to find in Manhattan. When we got off the A train I was praying that Dez would instantly fall in love with Bed Stuy and agree to ditch our dump and move to Brooklyn. She had more hope in our place than I did.

During my nap at Jas', Dez received a call from the general contractor about dinner…

Chapter 4 – “I Run New York”

Fast forward a bit… “the Mayor” (the gentleman formerly known as the general contractor from Amy Ruth’s) opened the door to Philippe’s Restaurant (no, no, you want to click this link). We started calling the general contractor the Mayor because everyone seemed to know and love him. He walked over to his business partner and a few moments later they were leading us down the stairs, through the kitchen, and behind a curtain. Apparently, the upstairs dinning area was for commoners; people like the Mayor eat in the wine cellar.

The waiter brought over hot lemon scented towels for us to wipe our hands with and the Mayor proceeded to order every possible animal that ever roamed the earth. Somewhere between our second and third course I realized that Russell Simmons was sitting across from us at the next table. I laughed to myself. In less than 12 hours I went from hating my life and wanting to move back home to loving my life…until I had to clean our apartment the next day.


♥ J’aime Bianca


And Bond, thank you for everything you did that day, you were amazing.